Last week my doctor switched me from Parnate (tranylcypromine) to Nardil (phenelzine).<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
At least it’s easier to spell.<\/p>\n
Yesterday at work my friends kept asking if I was high.\u00a0 I was very tired, maybe slightly euphoric in that tired kind of way.\u00a0 Not a particularly pleasant high, unless all I had to do was sit in the sun.\u00a0 Not if I had to correct the code of others in the middle of a deploy.<\/p>\n
After work, I had a date at the pub up the hill.\u00a0 I don’t know how it went.\u00a0 It seemed fine to me.\u00a0 I don’t think I did or said anything particularly offensive, as I am wont to do.\u00a0\u00a0 I like her, she’s attractive, was fun to talk and be with.\u00a0 It was a good time, and then it ended.<\/p>\n
Eh, it was a Monday night.\u00a0 Whaddya gonna do.<\/p>\n
Nardil isn’t making me any happier.\u00a0 On the contrary, I feel somewhat worse than when I was on a steady flow of the former MAOI.<\/p>\n
I’ve got to admit a gross violation of the suggested dietary restrictions for MAOI and any other anti-depressant.<\/p>\n
I consume alcohol daily.\u00a0 Sometimes not a lot, just a beer or two.\u00a0 Sometimes an awful lot (a bottle of wine or a bottle of whiskey apportioned in overpriced servings), sometimes nothing at all.\u00a0 But I do it, and I know I’m not supposed to, but fuck that.<\/p>\n
It’s the only thing that makes me feel “good” at the moment<\/em>.<\/p>\n So, I’m not giving that up.\u00a0 It isn’t going to happen.\u00a0 Same with smoking, although that doesn’t affect the anti-depressants.<\/p>\n Maybe Nardil is less tolerant of alcohol than Parnate.\u00a0 I’ve read bad things about most of its “hydrazine” class being recalled due to hepatoxicity.<\/p>\n In any case.<\/p>\n Sometimes.<\/p>\n I realize, where I’ve landed.<\/p>\n And, although I say I am happier than I ever was when married, and in a sense, I really am, when compared to the loveless marriage of the past few years, and others think so, too.<\/p>\n Sometimes.<\/p>\n I wonder.<\/p>\n Where is my beautiful wife?\u00a0 Where are my beautiful girls?\u00a0 Why am I all alone?<\/p>\n Why am I fucking crying?<\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Last week my doctor switched me from Parnate (tranylcypromine) to Nardil (phenelzine). At least it’s easier to spell. Yesterday at work my friends kept asking if I was high.\u00a0 I was very tired, maybe slightly euphoric in that tired kind of way.\u00a0 Not a particularly pleasant high, unless all I had to do was […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[14],"tags":[3,11,89,31],"class_list":["post-218","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-me","tag-depression","tag-maoi","tag-raw","tag-separation"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/fazigu.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/218","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/fazigu.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/fazigu.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fazigu.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fazigu.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=218"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/fazigu.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/218\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":235,"href":"https:\/\/fazigu.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/218\/revisions\/235"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/fazigu.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=218"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fazigu.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=218"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fazigu.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=218"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}